Highly recommended, for men and women, the old and the getting-there
“A resurgence of libido in an elderly man suffering from dementia, impotence and, incontinence brings new stress and heartbreak into the life of his still-healthy younger wife in this sad but brave debut novel by Jockie Loomer-Kruger. In clear, unadorned prose that moves the story smoothly and quickly along, the novel charts a marital map full of surprise. Highly recommended, for men and women, the old and the getting-there.”
It is simply written, but with so much heart and selflessness that I just kept turning the pages
“I was quite frankly hesitant about reading Until the Day We Die, yet another book about a family coping with dementia. I was responsible for the care of my father for 14 years; he suffered from mixed dementia and the experience still makes it challenging for me to revisit the life of a dementia caregiver. However, Jockie’s story about Jenny and her husband Rudy is different. It is simply written, but with so much heart and selflessness that I just kept turning the pages. I could so clearly feel (and remember) the anger, frustration, and powerlessness Jenny felt as she had to deal with the ‘professionals’ who at times could not be bothered or turned the other way to avoid having to deal with a ‘problem’ resident. But her love for her husband Rudy and her optimism and grit rose above all the obstacles they both faced. One last thing; Until the Day We Die honestly addresses the often ignored sexual needs of those with dementia, a need that remains with us until the day we die.”
A gifted and sensitive writer!
“Jockie Loomer-Kruger is a gifted and sensitive writer. Her prose is clear and her story beautifully crafted. Her characters are believable and convincingly rendered. Jenny Hoffman, a former florist, is devoted to her husband, Rudy, a retired professor, and Steinbeck scholar. As his dementia deepens in distressing ways, light blooms from Jenny’s heart and brightens an otherwise dim winter of discontent.”
This story will have you laughing, crying, cheering, pondering, and reflecting, straight through to its lovely full-circle ending
“A story for anyone who has ever loved deeply, ‘Until the Day We Die’ is an intimate look into the lives of long-married couple Jenny and Rudy as they navigate the ever-changing, and often tumultuous, waters of dementia. At its heart, this is a love story full of joyful memories, moments of bitter anguish, frustration, and rage, interspersed with flashes of hand-holding hope and clarity, as when Rudy declares: ‘I don’t know what I can’t remember. I just like things when they happen.’ Jenny and Rudy’s story will have you laughing, crying, cheering, pondering, and reflecting, straight through to its lovely full-circle ending.”
A superbly written account of the human condition
“Until the Day We Die is a heartfelt tale of the human spirit overcoming the ravages of time. A superbly written account of the human condition. Bravo!”
This reader was gripped from page one
“Until the Day We Die is a remarkable book. Told from the viewpoint of the wife, Jenny, the well-paced narrative carries the reader through a six-month period as Jenny attempts to deal with her husband’s life in a care home for seniors. This reader was gripped from page one. The author’s spirited prose propels the plot through life in the retirement home, events becoming increasingly complex and alarming: we share her rising panic as a fascinating tale unfolds. Vignettes of both caregivers and those cared for are indelible. They make the book vividly alive. The great achievement of this splendid book is its depth of understanding and compassion. Jenny’s love and dedication are a model for us all and the final pages come as a benediction. Until the Day We Die is beautifully written and relevant for these times when nursing homes and our vulnerable elders are much in the Covid-filled news.”
An intimate glimpse into a long love
“This intimate glimpse into a long love illuminates for readers that as our bodies and minds grow old, and we move within the painful hollow space left in our hearts by something as devastating as dementia, our love for each other remains steadfast in the memories that we hold dear.”
You won’t be able to put the book down
“Until the Day We Die is an evocative bittersweet story of the lonesome ‘dance’ of love and dementia, which the author tells in such straightforward terms and insightful tenderness, you won’t be able to put the book down. Jenny, the devoted, sensitive, and caring wife of Rudy, a former English Professor, living with dementia in the Shasta House Retirement Home, confronts both rigid company policies and personal obstacles contrary to what she thinks is best for her husband. The ensuing consequences take the reader on a wild ride of hair-raising situations and heart-breaking incidents that will make you wonder if it can all be resolved before things get even worse. A revealing book of the times! I found it frightfully believable and totally engrossing! A must-read!
I miss the characters already. A stirring and inspiring read for our times
“Unrelenting in its honesty, Until the Day We Die, is both wrenching and redemptive. In its ages, we encounter the vast expanse of human emotion and physical fragility, and the eternal presence of Love. I miss the characters already. A stirring and inspiring read for our times.”
A tender yet clear-eyed look at the complications of an enduring relationship
“Jockie Loomer-Kruger does not shy away from the harsh realities of aging and loss, and the desire to still be present in the world. With crisp writing and characters that are vivid and honest, this is a tender yet clear-eyed look at the complications of an enduring relationship.”
A poignant story of care-giving and marriage in the face of adversity
“Until the Day We Die is a poignant story of care-giving and marriage in the face of adversity. It is about love when confronted with the diminishment of a spouse due to the scourge of dementia, and a marriage that endures. Jockie Loomer-Kruger also reveals the troubling state of for-profit Senior Care well before the Pandemic.”
A love story that will resonate with readers
“Caught in a life consumed by the minutiae of caring for a partner with increasing dementia who is confined to a retirement home, 77-year-old Jenny Hoffman must deal with the added burden of her impotent husband’s re-energized sexual yearnings. Despite the need to constantly redirect Rudy’s attention, his new obsession rekindles Jenny’s own disappointment at the loss of their lovemaking. Memories of the couple’s early life and deep affection for each other, woven throughout the story, offer a counterpoint to their current situation. When a new resident moves into Shasta House, the complications that arise test Jenny’s devotion and force her to confront her own conflicted feelings. Written with sensitivity and humor, Until the Day We Die is a love story that will resonate with readers as an achingly honest portrayal of both the tender moments and the myriad challenges of navigating end-of-life realities.”
Until The Day We Die invokes a myriad of emotions in the reader
“Until The Day We Die invokes a myriad of emotions in the reader. It is a beautiful love story, yet a realistic and sad tale of those who are caught in the death trap of the dreaded and cruel grip of dementia. It also gives one an insight into how our lives can be changed by evil people and circumstances over which we have no control. It vividly portrays the difficulty of adapting to that change.”
“Raw” and “powerful” are adjectives that come to mind, but fall short of describing this compelling novel
“Loomer-Kruger’s art is such that she makes you forget you are reading a work of fiction. Instead, the reader feels that she has been given privileged access to the very thoughts and feelings of not only the main character, Jenny, but that of her husband, Rudy, an elderly gentleman with ever-worsening dementia. “Raw” and “powerful” are adjectives that come to mind, but fall short of describing this compelling novel.”
This novel is a tender love story for our times
“Not-for-the-faint-of-heart, Until the Day We Die is a skillfully-crafted story about marriage, romance, aging, memory loss, and long-lasting love. At times disturbing and uncomfortable, the story explores how life can change with dementia and reveal some of the heartbreaking challenges a loving partner may face. Ultimately, this novel is a tender love story for our times.”